


Closer

by musette22



Category: Actor RPF, Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Marriage Proposal, but I think it fits in the tag, well not quite a marriage proposal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:00:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25920976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musette22/pseuds/musette22
Summary: The relief that floods Sebastian at seeing Chris alive and well is intense, lifting some of that debilitating weight that’s been pressing down on his chest all evening, but it’s short lived. Because Chris looks... Well, he looks unfairly gorgeous as always, with his beard and his soft, cerulean eyes, but he also looks nervous and just a little bit shifty.The feeling of unease grows when Chris shoots him a smile that’s tense around the edges and says, “Hey, Seb. Can we talk for a moment?”Sebastian’s stomach drops, a physical sensation that makes him suddenly grateful he hasn’t had any food all day. He swallows through a tight throat, then takes a step aside and gestures for Chris to come in. “Sure,” he says hoarsely. “What’s up?”Chris smiles at him again, and wow, yeah, he’s definitely nervous.“Sit down for a minute, okay?” Chris orders gently, taking a step closer, and Sebastian closes his eyes. This is it.
Relationships: Chris Evans/Sebastian Stan
Comments: 55
Kudos: 282





	Closer

**Author's Note:**

> I know, yet another fic! I just can't seem to shut up about these guys. This one has been a looooongggg time coming. This is the ring-gate fic inspired by [this pic](https://musette22.tumblr.com/post/626546863429058560/closer/) that I wrote a year ago but never posted it because of reasons, but when I recently got a few asks about rings and proposals, I had another look at it and decided that I actually really liked it. So here it is. It’s a little angstier than usual for me, but it all works out better than alright. It's set during the Civil War press tour, Sebastian is a drama queen and so is Chris, and they’re just really really perfect for each other. Beta’d by the fabulous [@rainbowsandcoconut](https://rainbowsandcoconut.tumblr.com/) / Flamingle💛

“Hold the door!”

Sebastian’s hand instinctively shoots out to stop the elevator doors from sliding closed. When they open again, Anthony jogs up to him, face lit up in his trademark toothy grin.

“Thanks, dude,” Mackie says, stepping inside and offering Sebastian his fist to bump. Sebastian indulges him, then presses the button to his floor again. Mackie comes to stand next to him against the mirrored back wall and shoots him a sideways glance. “What’s up?”

“Nothing much,” Sebastian shrugs. “Just heading upstairs. Chill for a bit, I guess.” He stifles a yawn. “I don’t think I’ll ever get used to back-to-back interviews, man.” Mackie hums in agreement, and they ride the elevator in silence for a moment, until Sebastian asks, “Hey, you wouldn’t have seen Chris anywhere, would you?”

Mackie gives him a shrewd look that Sebastian pointedly doesn’t acknowledge. “Nah man, I don’t think so. Not after that interview with the dude who kept offering you candy.”

Sebastian snorts. “Yeah, what was that about?”

“Guess he was _sweet_ on you,” Mackie quips, then guffaws at his own lame joke.

Sebastian rolls his eyes, chuckling along with him until Mackie suddenly asks, “So, what do you need Chris for?”

“No reason,” Sebastian says, evasive. “Just… haven’t seen him in a few hours and he isn’t answering his phone, so I was just wondering if maybe you knew, uh…” He trails off and clears his throat, lamely finishing, “never mind.”

Mackie raises both his eyebrows. “Uh huh.” 

Sebastian feels a blush creep up the back of his neck and quickly raises a hand to it to cover it up. “Really, it’s not important.” 

“You sure about that?”

Sebastian rolls his eyes. “Yes, I'm sure. Just wanted to ask him something. About, uh, tomorrow's schedule. But it’s no biggie, it can wait.”

Mackie gives him a look that says, _I see your bullshit and I raise you an ‘I’m not buying it’._ “Right.”

Sebastian gives a curt nod. “Hmm.”

The ding of the elevator, signaling their arrival to their floor, cuts short any further interrogation Mackie may have had up his sleeve. Talk about being saved by the bell.

Following Sebastian out of the elevator, Mackie says, “Alright then, Sea Bass. You enjoy your beauty sleep, alright? If I hear from your man, I’ll send him your way.”

“Oh, c’mon, he’s not –”

“Of course he’s not,” Mackie cuts him off, smirking at him in that obnoxiously knowing way of his before turning on his heel with a flourish and setting off in the direction of his room further down the hall.

Sebastian huffs at Mackie’s retreating back. “Bye, _Anthony_ ,” he says loudly, like the mature adult he is.

“Goodbye, _Sebastian,_ ” Mackie calls over his shoulder, smirk evident in his voice.

Smiling, Sebastian shakes his head. He gets his key card from his pocket and flicks on the lights once he’s inside his own room, but when he gets his phone put, his smile falters. Still no word from Chris. There is a message from his manager, though, with a link to an article.

_Hey Seb, just a heads up; TMZ is speculating about Chris’s love life again. I’m sure it’s trash, it usually is with them, but thought you’d want to know anyway. Xxx”_

Sebastian frowns, tapping the link which takes him to the TMZ website.

The bold headline dramatically queries whether Chris is dating an up and coming actress that Sebastian’s only vaguely heard of but who is no doubt very beautiful. And sure enough, when he scrolls down, there are several pictures of Chris and a stunning young woman, chatting and smiling together at some event in LA last year. That in itself is nothing to worry about; Chris meets a lot of beautiful people in his line of work, and so does Sebastian, and if he was going to lie awake worrying about all of them, he’d be seriously sleep deprived.

To be fair, he’s been pretty sleep deprived lately anyway, but that’s down to a much more enjoyable cause.

The article itself, though, relays how the actress in question is currently also in Beijing, which apparently means she and Chris must be hooking up. It’s far-fetched at best, Sebastian knows that, and yet he can’t stop the twinge of unease. Because although he isn’t the jealous type and he trusts Chris completely, he can’t help but wonder about Chris’s whereabouts. It’s not like they explicitly agreed to meet up once the day’s commitments were done and dusted, but since that was what had happened every day of this press tour so far, Sebastian had just assumed Chris would come and find him after his last interview. Chris was nowhere to be found, though, so Sebastian had tried his room, the gym, the pool; he’d sent him several text messages and tried calling him a few times, but Chris never picked up.

The thing is, Sebastian worries easily. And even though he knows Chris is a big boy who can take care of himself, after a few hours of mysterious absence, he’d started to worry something might have happened to him. What if he went out and got lost? Beijing is a huge, unfamiliar city, after all. What if he got hit by a rickshaw, or hounded by overzealous Captain America fans? Weirder things have happened. Hell, weirded things have happened on _this press tour_.

Now that he’s seen that gossip blog, however, Sebastian’s traitorous mind wanders for a moment to another scenario. He worries his lower lip between his teeth, allowing himself to consider that alternative for a few awful moments. Instantly, it’s like someone’s doused him in cold water, dread settling in his gut at the mere thought of it, even though he _knows_ it’s nothing more than inane speculation. He gives a brisk shake of his head in an attempt to dispel the dark thoughts. There’s no way. Chris would never do that to him. Sebastian and Chris may only have been dating for a few months, but they’ve known each other for far, far longer than that, and Sebastian feels in his bones that Chris isn’t the cheating kind.

 _But_ … the little voice in the back of his head whispers maliciously. What if Chris is having doubts? Dating his male co-star in secret isn’t exactly a stellar situation for him to be in, Sebastian realizes that much. Even though they (mostly) knew what they were getting into, it has been challenging, keeping their relationship under wraps and pretending to the outside world that they’re nothing but good friends and co-stars. Just two bros being bros, nothing to see here, move along now, folks.

It’s worth it, though, if it means they can be together. At least, that’s how Sebastian feels. But maybe Chris doesn’t –

“No, _stop_ ,” he tells himself firmly, out loud this time. They’d talked about this only last week, and Chris assured him then that he thought it was worth it, too. There’s no reason for him to suddenly doubt that. Apart from the fact that he doesn’t know where the hell Chris is right now.

Sebastian huffs, raking a hand through his hair. He doesn’t _want_ to doubt Chris – in fact, he hates himself for entertaining these kinds of thoughts in the first place since Chris has never done anything to warrant the distrust – but then again, who’s to say he’s not having dinner with her right now? It doesn’t even have to be anything more than that yet, because Chris wouldn’t do that to Sebastian without talking to him first – but it could become more, couldn’t it?

Fuck.

Sebastian stalks over to the window, staring out unseeingly over the vast expanse of the Beijing night skyline. His hands grip the hardstone windowsill so hard he wouldn’t be surprised if it cracked under the pressure.

The more he thinks about it, the more it makes sense that Chris would rather have someone he could proudly show off to the world. Some fun, outgoing girl with great boobs and legs for miles. It’s his usual MO, after all, and Sebastian can’t really blame him. Why on earth would he want to sneak around with his anxious, closeted boyfriend when he could have all that and not have to hide?

On some level, Sebastian is aware that this is just another case of noisy brain syndrome– he’s learned that much from years of therapy, and from Chris, too – but for some reason, he’s spiraling tonight. He can’t help it. Because if he’s honest with himself, this _is_ one of his worst fears, and the more time passes, the more plausible the idea that Chris is about to dump him becomes. That, or maybe something’s happened to him.

He doesn’t know how long he spends alone with his increasingly anxious thoughts, pacing up and down his room and biting his nails to the quick. He’s far too vexed to sit still. Hasn’t even bothered taking off his jacket. He sneaks down the hall to knock on Chris’s door again because who knows, maybe he’s just taking a nap, but there’s no reply. He then tries to ring him twice more, but when it goes to voicemail again, Sebastian lets out a frustrated growl and shoves his phone under his pillow. Useless fucking thing.

Although he’s not even a little bit hungry, Sebastian knows that he really should eat something. The only thing he’s had all afternoon is some brightly colored Chinese candy, and a lunch of sugar and colorants can’t be helping his emotional state. He could order some room service; if nothing else, maybe it’ll distract him a little. Heaving a sigh, he picks up the room phone and quickly places his order of a salad and bread. He’s tempted to raid the mini bar while he waits for his food to be brought up, but in all honesty, he knows getting drunk won’t solve anything. It’ll probably just end up making him spiral more.

Sebastian startles when there’s a knock on the door only a few minutes later. Huh, he thinks. That’s some seriously speedy room service right there. He crosses the room in a few long strides, pulls open the door –

– and finds himself face to face with Chris.

The relief that floods Sebastian at seeing Chris alive and well is intense, lifting some of that debilitating weight that’s been pressing down on his chest all evening, but it’s short lived. Because Chris looks… Well, he looks unfairly gorgeous as always, with his beard and his soft, cerulean eyes, but he also looks nervous, and just a little bit shifty.

And that is… not good.

The feeling of unease grows when Chris shoots him a smile that’s tense around the edges and says, “Hey, Seb. Can we talk for a moment?”

Sebastian’s stomach drops, a physical sensation that makes him suddenly grateful he hasn’t had any food all day. He swallows through a tight throat, then takes a step aside and gestures for Chris to come in. “Sure,” he says hoarsely. “What’s up?”

Chris smiles at him again, and wow, yeah, he’s definitely nervous. “Sit down for a minute, okay?” Chris orders gently, taking a step closer, and Sebastian closes his eyes.

“Oh,” he croaks out, opening his eyes again and clearing his throat. He runs a hand through his longish hair, then crosses his arms. A defensive stance. “Um. I think I’ll stand, if you don’t mind.”

Chris’s eyes widen a fraction. “Yeah, of course,” he says quickly. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to boss you around.”

Sebastian shakes his head. “S’okay,” he manages to mutter, trying to reassure Chris despite his own agitation. It doesn’t really work, because now Chris just looks worried. He takes a step closer to Sebastian.

“You okay, baby?” His pretty eyes are shining with concern, and Sebastian has to close his own eyes for a moment, because he can’t deal with this right now – the pet name or the concern. The room is spinning a little and it's hard to think properly. He wipes his sweaty palms on his jeans and wishes Chris would just get it over with.

Two warm, strong hands settle on his shoulders, rubbing up and down his upper arms. Contrary to what Chris is likely trying to achieve, Sebastian hunches in on himself at the touch and has to resist the urge to shake him off. When he opens his eyes again, Chris is looking at him intently. “Maybe sit down for a minute anyway, yeah?”

This time, Sebastian obeys, because his legs feel shaky and his breathing is erratic. Chris sets him down gently on the edge of the bed, keeping his eyes locked on his face while he sinks to the floor in front of him.

As he’s gulping for air, Sebastian thinks, a little hysterically, _this is it._ He can’t believe it’s really happening.

They finally got together, after all that time they lost secretly pining for each other, all that time believing that his feelings for Chris were unrequited and that Chris was never going to want him back.

And then he _did_. There’d been that night a few months ago when Chris and Sebastian and some of their mutual friends had gone out for drinks together in New York, ending up at a slightly seedy karaoke bar where Chris had practically serenaded him. Yes, he’d been tipsy, but that didn’t take away from the fact that it had made Sebastian feel special. Chris was naturally affectionate and flirty, and Sebastian had always figured he didn’t mean anything by it, but this time, as Chris looked straight into his eyes while crooning an Elvis song, Sebastian knew that it was different. Even Chris Evans wouldn’t platonically tell his good pal that he couldn’t help falling in love with him, right? He’d followed Chris outside when he announced he was going for a smoke, and long story short, they’d ended up frantically making out against a dumpster. A less than romantic start for what had actually quickly turned into a fairy tale romance.

Since then, they'd been so happy together, _so_ happy – or at least, Sebastian had thought they were. But now it looks like that had just been him. Figures.

He makes one more concerted effort to tell his brain to shut the fuck up, that it’s just playing tricks on him, reminding himself again that Chris and he had talked frankly about how much they meant to each other just the other day. Chris even told him he loved him, for god’s sake, and Sebastian had said it back without even the slightest hesitation. Chris is it for him, he’s known that for a long time. But now Chris is breaking up with him and Sebastian honestly doesn’t know how he'll go on after this. How is he supposed to go back to a life without Chris? Without him in all the ways that matter, at least. And it’s worse, because he _had_ him, and now he’ll always know what he's missing, and he’ll have to live with the knowledge that he wasn’t enough for Chris and that Chris could never love Sebastian as much as Sebastian loves him, and it hurts, it hurts so _fucking much_ and oh shit, now he's really starting to hyperventilate –

Distantly, through the deafening roaring in his ears, Sebastian eventually realizes Chris is talking to him. “Breathe with me, honey,” he hears him say, his voice carefully calm and composed. “In, and out. In, and out. You’re doing great, you’re okay. I got you, Seb. I got you.”

For a few minutes, Sebastian does his best to focus on Chris’s voice, on his steady breathing, and slowly, gradually, he starts to come back to himself. Chris – wonderful, caring, beautiful Chris – pulls him back from the brink of a full-blown panic attack, squeezing Sebastian’s hands to ground him. Sebastian squeezes back and selfishly allows himself to cling to Chris for a little while longer, to let Chris take care of him one more time. The certainty that Chris _will_ take care of him, however much the poor guy probably wishes he was anywhere else right now, manages to calm him down further, even as a shiver of bone-deep sadness runs through him at the implication.

Once his breathing has slowed down enough for him to be able to speak again, Sebastian clears his throat again. “Sorry,” he whispers thickly.

“You’ve got nothing to be sorry for, sweetheart,” Chris says, shaking his head decisively. In a gentle voice, he adds, “You wanna tell me what’s wrong, hmm? When you’re ready?”

His eyes are so soft and worried, and Sebastian feels like he's drowning in them while desperately trying to memorize their color, the way they seem to be filled with genuine concern for his well-being. In that moment, he thinks that maybe Chris really does love him – if not as much as Sebastian loves Chris – and he’ll always have that, if nothing else.

He tries to lick his lips, but his mouth is too dry, and of course, Chris notices. He jumps to his feet, rushing to get him a bottle of water from the mini fridge. Cracking it open, he goes to hold it to Sebastian’s lips, but Sebastian has got a little bit of his composure back now and enough presence of mind to take the bottle from Chris’s hand and sip it under his own steam. Christ, this whole situation is embarrassing enough as it is without Chris having to bottle feed him.

Chris kneels in front of him again, resting his big, warm hands on Sebastian’s knees. He soothingly rubs them over his thighs, up and down, up and down, until Sebastian feels just a little bit more grounded.

“Sorry,” he says again, blinking rapidly.

Chris just smiles softly, the concern in his eyes still very much present, and _god_ , Sebastian loves him. He loves him so much it hurts. Though right now, everything kind of hurts.

“What’s going on, huh?” Chris queries in a low voice. “Did something happen?”

Sebastian shakes his head. “No, I…” His voice breaks, so he swallows and tries again. “I was just worried about you. I couldn’t find you anywhere and you weren’t answering my texts or my calls.” He wipes his eyes with the back of his hand and is surprised when it comes back wet. “You’ve never disappeared before,” he whispers, knowing as he says it that he’s being completely unreasonable. Chris shouldn’t have to report his every move to him, even if they are dating. Sebastian doesn’t want to be that kind of boyfriend, and now he is. No wonder Chris has had it with him. “I was just… worried,” he repeats finally, then bites down hard on the inside of his cheek. It hurts, but he deserves it.

Chris makes a tiny sound, bringing a hand up to the side of Sebastian’s face to wipe away the moistness under his eye with his thumb. “Oh, baby,” he coos, thumb still sweeping over his cheekbone. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you, I swear. I didn’t know you’d get so worried, but fuck, I shouldn’t have just taken off like that. I’m so sorry. I didn’t think, I had an errand to run and I –” He breaks off, suddenly looking nervous again. His tongue flicks out to wet his lips, and then he adds, “I wanted it to be a surprise.”

Sebastian blinks at him. Even in his distressed state, he realizes that that’s an odd choice of words if you’re going to break up with someone. He sucks his lower lip into his mouth, running his tongue over it a few times while he wrings his shaky hands.

“A surprise?” he asks tentatively. “What is... I mean, is it a – is it a good surprise, or a bad one?”

Chris opens his mouth to reply, but then there’s another knock on the door, startling them both.

“Were you expecting anyone?” Chris asks, surprised.

Sebastian frowns. “No, I…”

“Room service!” a cheery disembodied voice calls from the other side of the door.

“Oh yeah,” Sebastian breathes, briefly relieved before he remembers that he’s in no state to answer the door right now. He gives Chris a pleading look, and as always, Chris understands, because he gets up to deal with it. He only opens the door wide enough to roll in the food cart, and Sebastian is grateful for that; he’d rather not face any strangers right now.

Once Chris has shut the door, he turns around and looks at Sebastian. “Do you want to have this now, or…?”

“No,” Sebastian says quickly. “I… I’ll have it later. You, uh… you were saying something about a surprise?” 

Chris chuckles, a little nervously, coming to sit at Sebastian’s feet again. “Yes. Yeah. It’s ah, it’s a good surprise. I hope.”

Well, huh. That’s unexpected.

Sebastian takes a deep breath. “Okay,” he says, steeling himself. “Tell me.”

“Okay,” Chris exhales, dragging a hand over his face, before looking up to meet Sebastian’s eyes. “Alright. So. Sebastian.”

Heart in his throat, Sebastian unconsciously holds his breath as he waits for Chris to continue. He’s so tense that he startles a little when Chris reaches for his hand and holds it lightly in his own, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on his skin.

“I know we haven’t been together for all that long,” Chris starts, giving him a, gentle, lopsided smile, “but the past few months have been the happiest of my entire life. I’ve never felt like this about anyone before, not ever. What you and I have together is so completely different from any other relationship I’ve had – and not just because you’re a guy,” he says pre-emptively, cracking a small smile. “But because you’re everything I could ever want and more, Seb. You make me happy in ways I couldn’t even have _imagined_ before. You’re incredibly selfless and generous, and you’ve given me so much, baby. So much.”

Chris lifts Sebastian’s hand to his mouth, pressing a light kiss to the back of it. “Don’t get me wrong,” he goes on, “I’m really grateful for everything I had before, too. My life was already good, y’know? But you made it _great_. You made it amazing. You were the missing piece, and I never wanna be without you ever again.” Taking a shaky breath, Chris smiles again, a little self-deprecatingly. “I know I can come on a little strong sometimes and the last thing I wanna do is scare you off, but I figured; hey, you know me. You know me very well, actually, so I hope this won’t come as too much of a surprise.”

Not waiting for a reply, Chris straightens up a little, shoving a hand in the right pocket of his jeans and digging around, before pulling out a small, green velvet sachet, tied with a narrow ribbon. He fiddles with it for a moment, pulling it loose until he can carefully tip the contents of the sachet into his left hand.

And there, on his palm, lie two identical, silver rings.

Sebastian stares at them. Then he stares at them some more. Finally, he turns his eyes back to Chris, to find him looking back at him with a nervous, hopeful expression on his face. On a separate plane of consciousness, Sebastian wonders what his own face looks like right now. He honestly has no clue.

“I love you, Sebastian,” Chris says earnestly, lifting a hand to Sebastian’s cheek and caressing it gently with the back of his fingers. “I know this won’t always be easy. I know that by choosing each other, loving each other, we’ll have to make concessions in other parts of our lives. But I’m more than willing to make them if it means I get to have you. And if you meant everything you said the other day, then I think you are, too.”

Chris looks back down at the rings in his palm. “So,” he says, “that’s why I snuck off this afternoon. To have these made.” Looking up at Sebastian with his huge puppy dog eyes framed by his ridiculously long lashes, Chris explains, “They’re promise rings, Seb. Because I want to promise you that I’ll always be there for you. I’ll always support you, in everything you wanna do. I’ll always pretend to enjoy your awful cooking. I’ll always love you, and that’s a promise.” He gives Sebastian a watery smile. “So, what do you say, baby? Will you do me the honor of wearing my ring?”

In the ensuing silence, the static that fills Sebastian head is so loud it effectively drowns out any coherent thoughts he might have had in response to Chris’s speech. He distantly realizes his should probably react in some way, if only because Chris is going to start worrying any minute now, so he mentally elbows his way through the fogginess in his head and forces his brain to form a reply.

“Wh – huh?” he says eventually. Which, okay, is not very articulate, but it does capture his current state of utter confusion pretty accurately. “But you… I don’t –” he tries, then settles on a whispered, “you’re not gonna break up with me?”

There’s a pause, in which Chris blinks at him in confusion. “I- break up with you? What are you..?” He huffs out an incredulous laugh. “Sebastian, I basically just asked you to spend the rest of your life with me. I’d say that’s kind of the opposite of breaking up with you.”

When Sebastian still doesn’t respond, Chris’s frown deepens, until finally, the penny seems to drop. “Oh my god,” he breathes, wide-eyed. “You actually thought I was breaking up with you? _That’s_ what got you so freaked out?”

Sebastian, who’s starting to realize he may have come to the wrong conclusion, can’t really do more than nod dumbly in reply.

Groaning, Chris plonks himself down next to Sebastian on the bed and wraps his arms around him. He pulls him close to his chest, rocking him slowly from side to side. “Sebastian, what the fuck, sweetheart? How could you think that? Surely you _know_ …” He trails off, shaking his head. “And this was just because you couldn’t get hold of me?”

Sebastian makes a sound, face still partially smashed into Chris’s chest. “There was an article, too,” he mumbles into his clavicle. “About you and whatsherface.”

Chris pulls back a little to look at him. “Let me guess. TMZ?”

When Sebastian nods again, Chris rolls his eyes, exasperated but fond. “Sebastian. What did we agree _just_ last week about not believing everything we read in the papers, huh? I know it’s hard sometimes, it’s hard for me too, but we talked about this, didn’t we?”

And now Sebastian _really_ feels silly. “Ah,” he says sheepishly. “Yeah, we did.”

Chris gives him a look that very clearly says _you’re an idiot and you’re lucky I love you_ , and it’s that look that finally breaks through Sebastian’s haze of post-panic exhaustion, confusion, and flat-out bafflement.

He blinks at Chris a few times, then suddenly sits up straight, grabbing Chris’s hand and prying open his fingers.

There they are. Two rings. That really happened.

His eyes snap back up to Chris’s face, wide and stunned. “You- had these made?”

Chris smiles at him indulgently. “Yes.”

“For us?”

“ _Yes_.”

When the meaning of the gesture finally sinks in, a wave of pure, unadulterated happiness rises up in Sebastian’s chest so fast and fierce and unstoppable that it makes him feel lightheaded again – thought this time for an entirely different reason. He claps a hand over his mouth in a failed attempt to stifle the burst of laughter that escapes past his lips.

“Are you… laughing at me?” Chris asks, narrowing his eyes in suspicion, but he mostly seems amused.

Sebastian’s eyes grow even wider. “ _No_ ,” he says firmly. “Fuck, Chris, I’m sorry.” He barks out another joyful laugh, unable to stop now that he’s started. “Sorry, sorry, I’m not laughing at you, I swear,” he hiccups, shaking his head from side to side and smiling like a lunatic. “I’m just so fuckin’ _happy_.”

“Oh, thank god,” Chris exclaims dramatically, slapping a hand over his heart. “So in that case, d’you think there’s any chance I could maybe get an answer at some point?” He pulls a face. “I mean, it may have escaped your notice, but I actually just made a heartfelt speech, declaring my undying love for you and asking you to be mine forever. But, you know, I can see how you could’ve missed that bit, it’s not like I poured my heart and soul into–”

Sebastian surges forward and cuts off Chris’s rambling by catching his still moving lips in a searing kiss.

Chris’s arms tighten around Sebastian instantly, pulling him closer, crushing him to his chest the way Sebastian likes it. The closer the better, if you ask him. Sebastian breathes Chris in, feeling his own chest expand again now it’s been freed from the iron grip of dread. It’s like there’s a balloon in his chest that’s filling up steadily with love and happiness and _Chris_ , growing and growing until it feels like he might burst.

Chris breaks away suddenly, making Sebastian whine and chase his lips.

“So that’s a yes?” Chris asks breathlessly, his beautiful blue-green eyes sparkling.

“That’s a _fuck yes_.”

Squeezing his eyes shut for a moment, Chris leans in to press a hard, close-mouthed kiss to Sebastian’s lips, only to pull away again a second later. This is giving Sebastian whiplash. Chris untangles his arms from around him and takes his left hand to press one of the rings into his palm. Sebastian instantly closes his fingers around it, relishing the way it feels against his skin; smooth and solid.

Chris nudges him gently. “Have a look at it.”

Curious, Sebastian opens his palm again and holds up the ring, inspecting it up close. It’s a plain, silver band, simple but beautiful. Then, he notices something else: there’s an engraving on the inside. He tilts it to catch the light.

_I'm with you till the end of the line._

Oh.

That line, and everything it symbolizes, has become such a significant part of their lives over the past couple of years. It’s corny as hell, sure, but it was something to cling to, to repeat like a mantra when everything seemed hopeless. Reading it now, knowing how much it means to Chris, to the both of them, has tears suddenly burning in Sebastian’s eyes. When he looks back up at Chris, he finds him in a similar state.

“Chris…” Sebastian whispers, speechless. In a gesture that feels oddly significant, he slides the ring onto his own finger, then helps Chris to do the same with his. Wrapping his arms around Chris’s neck, Sebastian pulls him into another kiss, pouring everything into it. All his love, his longing, his affection, sighing into Chris’s mouth when he feels him kiss back with the same intensity.

Despite his mind playing tricks on him occasionally, Sebastian isn’t stupid, and he knows he won’t be able to wear Chris’s ring on his finger in public. Not until they both decide they want the world to know, and they feel confident they’ll be able to deal with everything that entails. But right now, he doesn’t care about that. They’ll find a way. He’ll get up early tomorrow morning and go out to buy them some chains, so they can wear the things around their necks. Over their hearts.

For now, he puts it out of his mind, which isn’t hard to do with Chris kissing up the side of his neck like this, sucking on that spot below his ear that drives Sebastian _wild_. He’s done more than enough thinking for one day. So he lies back, lets himself be loved on, and loves back just has hard.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Come and shout with me about these two on [Tumblr](https://musette22.tumblr.com/) if you want!


End file.
